Hi! We’re Jack and Soorya. The first time you meet us, it would be easy for you to assume we’ve always had a great relationship.
And, if you spent time with us, you’d see us regularly recommit to the importance of running our relationship on positive energy. You’d watch us playing with our personas and expanding our boundaries to experience more love and joy.
You’d also observe us getting stuck and passing through difficulties using conscious communication and discovery tools. You’d see us using these moments as opportunities to learn more about ourselves and each other.
You’d notice that our days are anything but dull as we consciously shift from stuck to flow to celebration with increasing speed and success. You’d quickly realize that nothing excites us more than expanding our capacity to live in this powerful way together.
What you’d really notice, though, is that the single most rewarding thing either of us can imagine is serving other couples along this path. You’d see us actively doing that from our home on beautiful Bowen Island, near Vancouver, British Columbia, through our coaching programs, workshops, and group activities.
We first met across a crowded dance floor, when we were both in university in Montreal. We were smitten with each other. And 3 years later, certain that we were old and wise enough, we got married — Jack at 22 and Soorya at 20.
Both of us were strong-willed and unskilled, so life started out rocky.
Our dance step was “attraction – aversion – cha cha cha…”. We thought we’d split up numerous times. Then came a particularly long and rocky period, during which we lived increasingly parallel, and then independent, lives with less and less contact. In September 2000, we separated for a year and a half.
The crazy thing was, we communicated more intensely during those 18 months apart than during the previous dozen or so years.
In one last ditch effort, we met up to decide once and for all – were we in or were we out?
Once again, we spotted each other across a crowded room; this time at Pearson Airport in Toronto. And within moments, it became clear that our journey together was not yet over.
We hugged and hugged and hugged some more, oblivious to everyone around us hurrying to get their luggage. Wordless, we held on tightly. Our bodies did the talking as we relaxed into each other and dropped our guards completely.
Relief flooded through us.
Over the next month, we created a retreat where we could begin to open and listen to each other, free from distractions. We committed to exploring being together, communicating from our hearts, and making our love easy.
We began learning new approaches, studying with various teachers and schools of thought. If a new idea worked in any way for us, we devoured it and put it into practice.
We started creating a vision of life together, honestly telling each other what we each needed and wanted. And side by side, we explored how we could shape our vision together this time around.
That vision resolved into clear action steps when we started our studies at the Hendricks Institute. There we found a worldwide community of people who were deeply dedicated to transforming relationships.
Using what we learned there, we now move through reactive moments with ever-increasing skill. And we do it in minutes, instead of the weeks, months — even years — it would have taken before!
Neither one of us has ever been good at compromise or sacrificing what we desire. But together, we’ve discovered the secrets of a growing and thriving relationship where we approach life as a team.
Each step of the way, we’ve learned to commit and recommit to more creativity, love and vitality. And, we’ve learned how much we want to share our discoveries with other couples, who are willing to turn their anguish into fuel for growth and their discontent into play.
After 40+ years of marriage, with all the trials, tribulations and breakthroughs that entails, we would love to share our secrets with you!